Do you struggle with people’s opinions of you?

Do you struggle with people’s opinions of you? Before you quickly say, No Lisa, I don’t. Just think about it for a moment.  Do you struggle with trying to please everyone or meet everyone’s expectations of you? Again, pause before you begin to shake your head No.

If we’re honest most of us have been there — worrying about what someone is saying about you, or attempting to please someone whose opinion really shouldn’t matter to you, or worse, changing who you are to try to fit in with the crowd! I’ll be addressing the “fit in” and “not welcome to the table” areas in a different post.

I know a woman leader who at the start of her public ministry over 30 years ago, (outside the 4 walls of the church), was ministering at different denominations, inter-denominations and non-denominational churches and to different cultures of women. She was told by someone that her voice was too strong. She began to pray and ask God to change her voice. She wanted a softer voice like some of the women at that time–where you could barely hear her. She prayed and at times cried over two years or so for God to change her voice.

He didn’t.

One day in her prayer time she heard in her heart, “Stop asking Me to change something about you that I created you to be.”

She wept.

She realized God was telling her to stop asking Him to change a beautiful part of her that He created. She never again prayed for a change to her voice. She learned that her voice was a gift and she learned how to fluctuate tone and numerous times since has been complimented on her delivery of the Word or business materials, her tone, her coaching, training and leadership abilities, her compassion, professionalism, experience and understanding of the needs of women. She’s always been well received on the podium and in the pulpit for both ministry and business.

Who is that woman you ask? Me.

I thought I needed to change to be like someone else so that I would fit in. God doesn’t call us to fit in. He calls us to love, to serve and to shine His light in this world. I was trying to meet the expectations of others. I had to let myself off the hook and just be who God made me to be!

Let me leave you with this…

You will never meet everyone’s expectations of you. Stop trying. You will never stop people from making untrue assumptions of you. Stop trying. The best thing you can do is to honor God, walk with integrity, be your best, give your best, do your best, be kind and compassionate, don’t focus on what you can’t change, or whose mind or situation you can’t change. Rather, focus forward on whose life you can touch and make a significant difference toward their future. God will take care of the rest for you.” Let yourself off the hook!

I have the pleasure of coaching amazing, powerful women who struggle with people pleasing, low confidence and attempting to be someone God didn’t create them to be in ministry, business or their personal lives. You can be a good person, a good leader and still deal with these areas of struggle. I know because that was me. Interested in changing your perspective and learning how to navigate through this very real area that can cause anxiety or frustration? Contact me.

I hope that encourages you as you BE and DO all that you are purposed by God to be and to do!