Trusting in Jesus

Woman walking cross country and trail in autumn forestBy Bernadine McIntosh

I’ll be the first to admit, I have a short attention span.  In fact I often joke that my attention span is as short as that of the children I teach.  Case in point, I was recently cleaning my house when I got distracted by my old journals and other notebooks I’ve written in over the years.  So I found myself instead of cleaning, sitting down reading through journals that dated back to the 1990’s.  In one of the more recent ones I found a letter I had written to God.

Usually if I’m unable to voice my thoughts to I put pen to paper.  Hence, I’ve written many letters over the years with the greeting, Dear Jesus…  I’ll share the one I referred to with you.

Dear Jesus,

It’s 2:21 am and needless to say I’m in the midst of a bad case of insomnia.  So I thought since I can’t sleep and you never sleep I’d write you a letter.

Someone said something that upset me today.  I don’t think it was meant to hurt me but, it did. Tonight I kept tossing and turning wondering, am I crazy to still trust you, still believe your promises, still have faith?

There are times, I admit, when it feels like I am but, how can I not?

To stop believing, for me is to stop living.

How can I get beyond difficult times if I don’t trust that you will make it better?

How can I tell others about the God I serve if I don’t believe you’ll stand by your word?

The truth is that I don’t understand you sometimes.  Let’s be real, I don’t understand you most of the times but, I have faith in you.

I will always have faith in you!

I will always trust you!

Trusting you always,


After I finished reading the letter, I thought back to the circumstances under which I had written it.  It wasn’t anything major, but it was something that had caused me pain so I wanted to talk it over with Jesus.  He is the first person I want to talk to whatever I’m faced with in life.  I know He’s the only one who is able to still the voices of doubt in my head. For he has said in his word,

Matt: 25:28 (AMP) Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy-laden and overburdened, and I will cause you to rest. [I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls.]

I remember that after I’d poured out my heart in that letter to Jesus that night I turned out my light and went to sleep, knowing that I had given my cares and worries to him.  In exchange he gave me exactly what he promised, rest for my soul.

Over the years, in my walk with Jesus I’ve had my share of nights like the one I mentioned. However, there is one thing I am sure of; Jesus is always there, he has promised never to leave us or forsake us… even at 2:21a.m in the morning.


bmpicBernadine McIntosh is a child of God, born and raised in a small town in the Bahamas.  She’s a quietly opinionated bookworm who loves family, friends, coffee, laughter and Jesus, just not necessarily in that order. You can often find Bernadine curled up in her favorite chair reading a book or writing in one. She is a work in progress whose desire is to live a life that honors God and to tell others of His love for them.  Please connect with Bernadine at her blog: Trusting Him with Today.

17 Responses to Trusting in Jesus

  1. Bernadine, thank you for sharing such a practical and powerful message and allowing us to see into one of your tender moments with Jesus. I love when you said: “I remember that after I’d poured out my heart in that letter to Jesus that night I turned out my light and went to sleep, knowing that I had given my cares and worries to him. In exchange he gave me exactly what he promised, rest for my soul.”

    That says it all! Love you.

    • Thank you Sis. Lisa. I always feel better after I’ve poured out my heart to Jesus. I appreciate the opportunity to share my walk with Him with others. Love you too.

  2. Today, I am resting in HIS presence and trusting HIM who loves me most! Thank you for sharing your heart. Thank you for allowing us to glimpse into your journal and identify with you as we have “all” sat in the place of “hurt and questioning.” God bless you as you continue to teach little ones and share the love of Jesus with the entire world!

    Hugs and prayers,

  3. As I read your words Bernadine, the passage from Psalms 127:2b God grants sleep to those he loves came to mind. As one who often journals, I appreciate that we can take our concerns to him.

  4. Isn’t is precious to be able to pour your heart out to Jesus? My heart was blessed today by the words you have so lovingly written to Jesus. Thank you for sharing such an intimate love for Him.
    He is a God who never sleeps…who cares for us…be blessed in knowing others share in your thoughts. I needed to read this today…

  5. I have often thought how easy it is to trust, or to have faith when we don’t actually need it. But when the times are tough and the soul’s disturbed, that’s a different matter altogether. I love your perspective. Like you, I have come to know that God is good. All the time. We can trust and obey in full confidence. Thank you for sharing your heart.

  6. Bernadine!! It is nice to know that someone else starts their journal off with Dear Jesus! Thank you for sharing a piece of journaling time with us. I hope that many women who will read this will see how transparent we can be when talking with our Father in heaven. Thank you 🙂

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