Questioning God

Woman walking cross country and trail in autumn forest

“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” Proverbs 22:6 NLT

When my children were little, I carried a bag with a Bible, journal, and pen everywhere I went.  Anytime I had a spare moment, I grabbed them and began reading, studying, and writing. With moments scarce, I continued to persevere.

On many days, I became frustrated. My thoughts were randomly interrupted by flying Lego’s, a pint size boy dressed in batman pajamas leaping from the arm of the sofa confident he could fly, or some other equally demanding emergency. With pint size emergencies attaining nearly every ounce of my attention, I questioned God.

Crying out to God, I said, “Why should I keep doing this? I can’t possibly be retaining anything? What’s the purpose?”

I wanted to be a great mom as much as I wanted to obey God, but I wasn’t sure how I could do both. It just didn’t seem like it was working. In the midst of my frustration, God spoke to my heart saying, “Continue on!” and I did.

Surely this endeavor would get easier as my pint size boys grew into adolescents and teenagers.  Wrong! As we entered into the adolescent and teen years I remarried and two teen girls were added to my three boys. Yep, you heard me correctly. I entered the land of four teens and an adolescent. Oh, and did I mention my own reentry into the local community college as a full time student? Once again, I found myself questioning God again. And again, God answered, “Continue on!” and I did.

Many times during those years, I was beyond distraught trying to keep up with it all. However, every available moment I could be found reading my Bible, journaling, and writing. Though I do not remember much of what I read or studied, I remember the presence of my Lord and Savior, Jesus holding me up. Yes, Jesus was with me every step of the way.

One by one, my children have become independent adults and the craziness of life has taken on a new shape. My daily quiet time is actually quiet most days and has grown tremendously, but I think about all the days when I was dragging my “Bible-bag” as the kids called it to horse shows, school parking lots, football games, and many other places.

As I reflect back, I see God graciously molding and shaping my heart and life through His word. I see God’s grace through the giving of His son, Jesus mercifully poured out through the life of my family. A few days ago, God reminded me of the importance of trusting Him, allowing Him to order my days, and the impact my days have on the lives of those around me.

While riding in the car with two of my grandchildren, Savannah and Elijah, my heart was touched as I heard six year old Savannah reading lengthy Bible stories to her three year old cousin, Elijah. A little later, Savannah said, “Eli, I love you from the grass all the way to Jesus…..that’s how much!”

So, on the days when you wonder why you are reading/studying God’s word, know you are the Jesus those precious little blessings see every day of their lives. And as your teens test every nerve you have and stomp all over your heart, know Jesus is working in and through your life and theirs in ways beyond my capacity to explain to and your ability to comprehend.

Soldier on, friends! Jesus is with you each and every step of the way.

By His mercy and in the grip of His grace,

Andrea

phone pics 121Andrea Perdue.  I’m a wife, mom to a blended family, nana, and friend who embraces life seeking to become the person God created me to be. My days are full, but there is always time for writing, reading, and sharing Jesus grace and love with others. It’s my prayer God will use me in the craziness of each day. Please connect with Andre at  Arise2Write or on faceook.com./andrea.perdue

24 Responses to Questioning God

  1. Andrea,

    Thank you for your sharing this precious message. As a Grandma to a almost 7 and almost 6 year old girls, I have the pleasure of pouring into them as we did our children when they were growing up and to see their love and interests in Jesus–singing songs to Him, reading bible stories with them, praying with them and hearing them pray together just blesses my heart. My continued prayer is for their parents to walk with Him with the same passion and we believe God is using their children to reach their hearts for Jesus.

    Love you and keep going my friend, sharing your love for Christ with your family and those around you.

  2. Thank you, Lisa. I am thankful GOD continues to grow my heart and daily I see Him work in the lives of my children. God is awesome to work even when we think we haven’t done a good enough job. He constantly reminds me, “It’s not about Him, but all about His son, Jesus!”

  3. Great encouragement here Andrea! I can see myself in so many of your situations! I still have some of my journals from those days when our three kids were small and when I read them now I can see how Jesus helped me through so many hard places.

  4. Oh Andrea…this spoke to me!!! I believe this is great encouragement to moms with children of any age — keep on keeping on and let God’s amazing, powerful and living Word change generation after generation!!

  5. I am blessed to be your friend, Andrea. I remember those days, when you also gave your love to a very sick friend, and to an elderly Mother of the man you love. I also recall you being one of the most devoted Chiristian Mothers I have been blessed to know. You inspire so many women to trust God at his word, and your love for him is contagious. I see great blessings in store for you, as God continues to grow the writing ministry He has so gifted in you. I am so thankful to be able to share in the joys of your testimony! Blessings and grace be to you dear friend!!

    • Renee: I wept as I read your message. Thank you so much for your encouragement. It’s easy to think one is not worthy or become discouraged. You have reminded me to keep my focus on GOD and trust HIM for the outcome.
      Blessings, love, and prayers,
      andrea

  6. Oh Andrea, what an encouraging post to persevere! There are times when it’s easy to wonder if what you’re doing makes a difference. I love that you obeyed and continued on with your Bible and reading in the midst of it all. His presence was with you. And I love that now you get to witness the fruit of that faithfulness to Jesus. Praise Him!

    Blessings and love,
    Debbie

    • Amen, Debbie! I am praising GOD with all I’ve got that somehow amidst the craziness of it all my children learned to love Jesus and now their children are learning to love Jesus! Persevering definitely pays off when GOD is involved.
      Blessings and prayers,
      andrea

    • Thank you, Shortybear/Denise! Thank you for faithfully reading the articles I write. You, my friend are an awesome encourager and prayer warrior and I am thankful to have you as a sister in Christ! How blessed we are to have been joined together through the blog world.
      Blessings and prayers,
      andrea

  7. I’m not a parent, but this “Soldier on, friends!” just encouraged me so much. Encouraged me to keep at it when it looks like I’m not making headway, and to keep trusting God has a purpose. So great to read your heart, Andrea!

    • Thank you, Kristen. I am thankful you were encouraged by this article. I’m right there with you, “Soldiering on!” whether I see progress or not. All the while we will both trust our Heavenly Father!

      Blessings and prayers,
      andrea

  8. Amazing Andrea. What an inspiration. I have no family but do recognize the struggle. Lovely just lovely. And the quote from Savannah….I will use myself. Love u

    • Thank you, Krisann for visiting, reading, and encouraging! You will be encouraged by the other articles on this site. There are lots of wonderful Godly women sharing their hearts here.
      Love, hugs, and prayers,
      andrea

  9. What a beautiful post this is, and I could feel every word you wrote. Your faithfulness even in difficult circumstances has paid off, and will continue to bear fruit. For me, it was a great privilege getting to know you better through your blog, your FB posts, and even through the wonderful phone conversation we had when I was in the States a few months ago! Abba Father is your strength, shield, refuge, and provider! Much love, Lidia

    • Thank you, Lidia for your prayers and encouragement. Whether we stay in contact regularly or not, I know you are one who is praying for me and that means more to me than you could possibly know. I am blessed our lives crossed and also blessed to witness and pray for GOD in your life. God is awesome!

      Hugs and prayers,
      andrea

  10. You had me at “scarce moments”! There was an era of my life riddled with them. Like you, it began with the rearing of wee ones. It then morphed into work, which ultimately morphed into ministry. Some nights I was tempted to wear my clothes & shoes to bed just to avoid having to spend even 2 minutes getting undressed. But one thing I rarely marginalized: my early morning devotions. I’d rise early in order to have at least an hour. I’d read, study, ponder & pray; and journal. As I look back, I can see the rock-solid, unmovable brick & mortar that was that foundation. Thank you for reminding us of what’s truly vital & true & sustaining: God’s presence & word!

Share your thoughts?

Copyright © 2015 Lisa Shaw Cares

Customly-Created-with-Care-by-Noelle-Mena