Do you ever ask God why?

I invite you to visit Cindy Bultema’s post for Summer Son-shine.

By Cindy Bultema

Have you ever wondered, “God, where are you?”

I mean, we learn as small children in Sunday school that God is everywhere— but have you ever tilted your head back and asked the God of the Universe, “Where. Are. You?”

True confession: I have. Although it still seems like yesterday, it was actually the winter of 1998.

Although addiction had taken a toll on my early young adult years, circumstances were finally looking up. After many years of self-defeating choices and rebellion, I had recently dedicated my life to the Lord and fallen in love with God’s Word. I was a single mom to my delightful little preschool-aged son named Jake, engaged to a wonderful Christian man named David, and David and I were in the midst of planning our beautiful dream wedding.

Life couldn’t get any better.

And then, in one horrific phone call and with the painful words, “I’m sorry, Cindy, David has been killed”— my life was forever changed.

Two grief-stricken weeks later, while surrounded by masses of snow in subzero weather, as I a painstakingly attempted to shovel my snow-covered driveway, I found myself asking the question, “God, where are you?”

Although actually it went more like this, “OK God, where are you?! You said you’d never leave me or forsake me, but where are you? Jake’s freezing, he has icicles hanging from his eyelashes for crying out loud, I’m cold, I’ve got this whole stinking driveway to shovel, David’s gone—this just isn’t fair, God. Where. Are. You?”

I even shook my shovel in anger at God that blizzardy day.

Suddenly, in the midst of my outburst, a car stopped and a young college kid hopped out.

“Hey lady,” he called, “this looks like a pretty big driveway for you and your son. Go on in the house and let me take care of it for you.”

Tears poured down my face as I quietly whispered the words, “Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.”

In the book of Deuteronomy, Moses reminds the Israelites— and us—of God’s promise to never leave us nor forsake us.

Deuteronomy 31:8 – The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

The next time life circumstances cause YOU to wonder “God, where are you?”— Go ahead and ask Him, He might be closer than you think.



Cindy 2014Cindy Bultema loves the Lord, loves her family, and loves to celebrate! With nearly 20 years of ministry experience, Cindy is a popular women’s speaker, author, and Bible teacher. But don’t let her cheerful smile fool you—Cindy has endured single parenting, overcome bondage to addiction, and survived tragic loss. Sharing messages of God’s hope and redemption is now Cindy’s great delight. Her first video-driven Bible study, Red Hot Faith: Lessons from a Lukewarm Church, was released in July 2014.

Cindy lives in Michigan with her husband and their four kids. Most days you can find Cindy walking her dog Rocky, attending one of her boys’ hockey games, or serving hot lunch at her kids’ school. Visit Cindy at




5 Responses to Do you ever ask God why?

  1. What a wonderful testimony of God’s faithfulness! He takes care of us and all our needs, bringing encouragement when it is needed most!

    Blessings, Joan

  2. Dearest Cindy,

    Thank you for sharing your heart with us. Knowing you and your story from back when I used to be able to follow blogs a lot, :), reading this has reminded me of how much strength God poured into you during that season of your life. I had some seasons of grief in 1990, 1994, 2005, 2007 and others and I can tell you that there were moments when all I could do was look up–I had to see God, sense God, hear God, even taste God and experience God in the situation in order to keep standing through it. The best way I learned how to put it to words is that I had to see Christ in the crisis!! Reminding myself, as you did, that He would never leave me or forsake me and you know–He never has!

    I love Him dearly because He first loved me and has shown it time and again.

    Thank you for the reminder, the strong encouragement and how your words will touch the hearts of others who need that same strength.

    Love you.

  3. Cindy,
    Just like God, huh? Meets you right where you are and in such a practical way. I’m so glad you didn’t miss His presence. I am sorry for your pain. Loved your post. God is near to us-so near- when we are suffering.

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